How to Recover from Childhood (Developmental) Trauma

Have you ever felt like you’re stuck in the same emotional patterns, no matter how hard you try to change? Or maybe you’ve wondered why certain experiences seem to trigger deep responses that feel out of your control? If so, you may be living with the effects of developmental trauma.

Developmental trauma doesn’t always result from one major event; rather, it can arise from a series of relational injuries, neglect, or instability during the critical years of childhood and adolescence. These formative experiences profoundly shape our understanding of ourselves, our relationships, and our place in the world.

The effects of developmental trauma can persist into adulthood, impacting our sense of safety, self-worth, and ability to form healthy, stable relationships. In this blog, we will explore what developmental trauma is, how it affects us, and how a compassionate, holistic approach can support your healing journey — helping you build the life and relationships you truly desire.

What is Developmental Trauma?

Developmental trauma refers to the emotional, psychological, and sometimes physical wounds that result from chronic stress or neglect during childhood. This can include emotional unavailability from caregivers, repeated exposure to conflict or violence, and environments where a child’s basic needs for love, safety, and security are not consistently met.

Unlike a single traumatic event, developmental trauma is cumulative. It may not always be recognised or acknowledged, especially if it arises from circumstances that seem “normal” on the surface, like being raised in a chaotic household or feeling emotionally disconnected from parents or caregivers.

This type of trauma can impact the development of key emotional and cognitive skills, such as self-regulation, self-esteem, and the ability to form secure attachments with others. It can also have long-term consequences on mental health, contributing to anxiety, depression, and difficulties in relationships.

What’s challenging about developmental trauma is that its roots often stretch back to a time when we were too young to fully understand what was happening, which can make the path to healing feel overwhelming or unclear.

Examples of Developmental Trauma

Some experiences that may contribute to developmental trauma include:

• Growing up in a household with addiction or mental illness
• Experiencing emotional or physical neglect
• Being subjected to or witnessing abuse
• Having a caregiver who was emotionally unavailable or inconsistent
• Living in an environment with chronic conflict or instability

These early experiences can lead to a pervasive sense of insecurity, difficulty trusting others, and challenges with emotional regulation into adulthood.

How Developmental Trauma Affects Us

Developmental trauma affects us in profound ways. Because it occurs during formative years, it can shape the way we see ourselves and the world around us. Individuals who have experienced developmental trauma may struggle with:

• Chronic feelings of shame or inadequacy
• Difficulty forming or maintaining relationships
• Persistent anxiety or hypervigilance
• Emotional numbness or difficulty identifying feelings
• Patterns of self-sabotage or people-pleasing

When our emotional needs aren’t met consistently in childhood, our brain and body develop coping mechanisms that protect us in the short term but can hinder our growth and connection in the long run. These coping mechanisms can include shutting down emotionally, avoiding vulnerability, or even dissociating from difficult experiences altogether.

You might notice it in the way you react to stress—perhaps with overwhelming anxiety or feeling numb and disconnected. You may struggle with feelings of shame, guilt, or confusion about why you’re reacting the way you are. These reactions are not “wrong”; they are the body’s way of trying to protect itself from further harm, often long after the threat has passed.

It’s important to recognise that these responses are not signs of personal failure; they are survival strategies that were developed in response to an environment that was unpredictable or unsafe.

The good news is that healing is possible, and by addressing the root causes of these behaviours, it’s possible to foster a deeper sense of self-worth and security.

Healing from Developmental Trauma: A Holistic Approach

Healing from developmental trauma requires more than traditional talk therapy. While discussing our experiences is an important part of the process, trauma often resides in the body and can manifest as physical sensations, emotional responses, and ingrained patterns of behaviour.

Importantly, healing developmental trauma isn’t just about revisiting the past—it’s about building a bridge to the present and learning how to reconnect with the parts of ourselves that have been pushed aside for so long. It’s about learning to feel safe in our bodies and emotions again, step by step, at a pace that feels right for us.

That’s why a holistic approach is essential.

A trauma-informed therapist works with both the mind and body to help you process and release the effects of trauma. This may involve:

• Somatic Therapy: Exploring how trauma is held in the body and learning techniques to release physical tension and restore a sense of safety within yourself.
• Mindfulness Practices: Using breathwork, meditation, and grounding exercises to help regulate the nervous system and reconnect with the present moment.
• Attachment-Focused Therapy: Understanding and repairing the attachment wounds that developed during childhood to foster healthier, more secure relationships in the present.
• Compassionate Inquiry: A gentle method of exploring internalised beliefs and emotions, helping you to identify and heal from past wounds with empathy and understanding.

In our sessions, we explore the emotional wounds that have been carried for so long, but in a way that feels manageable. By paying attention to the body’s signals and the emotions that arise, we can begin to untangle the deep-rooted patterns and slowly heal from the inside out.

The Power of Connection to Heal Developmental Trauma

One of the most powerful tools in healing from developmental trauma is connection—both with ourselves and with others. Developmental trauma often leaves us feeling disconnected and alone, so rebuilding that sense of connection is key to healing.

This is where therapy can be life-changing. It offers a safe space where we can learn to trust again, where we can be heard and understood without judgement. Through this process, we can start to repair the broken connections within ourselves, opening up the possibility for deeper, more fulfilling relationships.

The Role of Neuroscience in Trauma Healing

In recent years, we’ve learned so much about how trauma affects the brain and body. Neuroscience shows us that trauma rewires our nervous system, often keeping us stuck in survival mode. This might look like feeling constantly anxious or on edge, or it might show up as emotional numbness.

Understanding the neuroscience behind trauma can be incredibly validating. It reminds us that our responses to trauma are not signs of weakness or failure—they are the body’s automatic and purposeful way of trying to protect us. This understanding is also crucial in helping us find the right therapeutic approaches to healing.

Rediscovering Your Inner Strength and Resilience after Trauma

One of the most empowering aspects of healing from developmental trauma is discovering or rediscovering your inner strength and resilience. It can be easy to feel overwhelmed by the weight of your past, but therapy can help you reconnect with your innate wisdom and capacity for growth.

Through a trauma-informed approach, you can begin to understand how your early experiences shaped your current behaviours and beliefs. And, you can learn how to transform these patterns, so you can live a life that feels aligned with who you truly are.

It’s not about forgetting what happened but about reclaiming your power and autonomy in the present moment. Healing from developmental trauma is a journey that requires patience, compassion, and support – but with the right guidance, it is entirely possible.

Finding the Right Support for Your Healing Journey

If developmental trauma feels like a heavy weight that you’ve carried for far too long, know that healing is possible. It may take time, patience, and support, but you can create a new way of being that feels lighter, more connected, and more aligned with who you truly are.

At Wise Beginning Counselling & Psychotherapy, we specialise in supporting individuals who have experienced developmental trauma. We believe that everyone deserves to feel seen, heard, and supported as they heal.

In therapy, we work together to uncover and heal the wounds of developmental trauma. It’s not about forcing anything to happen but about gently creating space for healing to unfold in its own time.

Our holistic approach integrates neuroscience, somatic practices, and compassionate therapy to help you connect with your inner wisdom and build a sense of safety within yourself. Healing is not a linear process, but with the right support, it can lead to a deeper understanding of yourself and the freedom to live a life that feels authentic and fulfilling.

If you’re ready to begin your healing journey, reach out to us today. We’re here to walk alongside you, at your own pace, every step of the way.

References and additional resources

24/7 SUPPORT:

Police, Fire or Ambulance – 000

Lifeline – 13 11 14

Kids Helpline – 1800 55 1800

Domestic Violence Hotline (QLD) 1800 811 811

Levine, P. & Frederick, A. (1997). Walking the tiger: Healing trauma: The innate capacity to transform overwhelming experiences. California: North Atlantic Books.

Fisher, J. (2017). Healing the fragmented selves of trauma survivors: Overcoming internal self – alienation. New York, NY: Routledge.

Wolynn, M. (2016). It did not start with you: How inherited family trauma shapes who we are and how to end the cycle. New York, NY: Penguin Books.

Jablonka, B. (2009). Transgenerational epigenetic inheritance: Prevalence, mechanisms, and implications for the study of heredity and evolution. The University of Chicago Press Journals 84(2) 131-176. Doi.org/10.1086/598822

Perry, B. D. (2008). Child maltreatment: A neurodevelopmental perspective on the role of trauma and neglect in psychopathology. In T. P. Beauchaine & S. P. Hinshaw (Eds.), Child and adolescent psychopathology (p. 93–128). John Wiley & Sons Inc.